Burden
by MegaMena
Summary: Fighting to keep the past to the past, Kobayashi confronts it once again as she becomes part of a volleyball team, gets an admirer and meets a childhood friend. Her problems reaches the top, when someone confesses their love and she no longer can hide her feelings behind her thick mask.
It was the first day of school. Not for her though. Perhaps this school year, but not high school year. She was in 2E. Her name was famous. Kobayashi, a former female junior volleyball player known for her determination and strength. She watched the new high school students from the class window. She tried to find a word that would fit the crowd, but concluded that it was a strange crowd of fresh men this year. Her own year was very monotone. Kobayashi went down to see the new students from a close distant. Every single club was fighting to get the students to join. It made her sick. She didn't really know why. Kobayashi watched the schools two volleyball team fight for members. That too made her sick, and she still didn't know why. Perhaps because she wanted to join and still didn't, because of her accident in junior high that wounded three people and got her to the hospital? She didn't feel ready to play and especially not with other people. She was a danger, a burden for the people around her. She couldn't be so selfish and just join the female volleyball team, knowing she will hurt them and disappoint them. She went to her class again. Luckily, her class ends early today, so she can train judo for herself in the gym, before the volleyball team comes.

Sakura Kobayashi is a 16-year-old 2nd year student in Karasuno high. She stopped playing volleyball in her final year at her junior high, because of an accident that wounded three players and herself. She went to hospital for it. The next day she watched her team play. The game went smoothly and like a working machine, the players helped each other. She realized that she wasn't of use for the team and stopped. Why should she play, if she only hurts the machine, the team? Since then, Kobayashi has been entering and dropping out of sports activities. She only held on to judo, because her father runs a little dojo in their neighborhood. Now she trains a little judo in Karasuno's gym every day to keep her strength and sometimes she serves a volleyball over an invincible net, just to remember the feeling she had a long time ago. She did that in her first year at Karasuno and she will do it the second year two. And she did. At least one week in her 2nd year, until she encountered some, who will become the most important people in her life.

Kobayashi swung her arms in the air, controlling the air, which was her only training partner. She swung her leg around the enemy and swept the enemy down. O soto gari. A real person would have been on the ground right now, the air didn't. She stared blankly forwards and in the corner of her eye, she saw a volleyball. Almost too tempting. She looked up at the watch. She had five minutes before the male volleyball team would come and take over the gym. She slowly walked over to the ball. With the ball in her hand, she walked over to the serving point on the volleyball court drawn on the floor. One deep breath and then she ran, threw the ball in the air and made a jumping serve. A canon like sound filled the air. The serve was in. It made her deaf and it felt good. She could still feel the pain in her leg, but it was minor. The sound of the ball was mayor. It filled her with joy. She quickly took the ball to try again. She threw the ball, she jumped, she hit and it was in. She giggled to herself.

''Waow, do that again!'', a young was said in admiration. Kobayashi jumped a little at the sudden sound and slowly turned around to see two fresh men standing in the doorway of the gym.

''What…?'', Kobayashi slowly said as she tried to figure out who they were.

''Do that amazing serve again! It went BOOM!'' the orange haired guy said and swung his arms in the air.

''I guess…'', Kobayashi said calmly. She didn't even talk that much to her classmates and now suddenly wo guys are forcing her two serve. It was strange, but Kobayashi didn't really mind. It had been a long time since anybody had admired her volleyball skills. She did the serve again and the orange haired guy was euphoric.

''Calm down Hinata! You're making yourself look like an idiot!'', the dark haired guy yelled and hit the orange haired guy on the head. Meanwhile, Kobayashi slowly tried to get out of the gym. She didn't feel social today. Or this month.

''PLEASE~'', Hinata begged and bowed ''One more!''. Kobayashi couldn't resist and served one more time. Hinata hoorayed at the serve and she smiled at the doorway. And quickly regretted it. The rest of the volleyball team stood in the doorway and clapped at the serve. Kobayashi wished she was at home.

''Could you please be a side judge while we practice?'' Hinata asked Kobayashi.

''You already asked so much from her, you idiot! Know your manners!'', the dark haired guy yelled. Kobayashi looked at Hinata. They were the same height and she saw similarities in his eagerness and in her eagerness when she started playing in junior high.

''We want to have as many players on the court as possible! We have to play against Aoba Johsai in a training match tomorrow and..''

''Okay, I'll do it!'', Kobayashi interrupted Hinata. His eyes lighten up and he thanked her sincerely. Then she was introduced to the rest of the volleyball team. Most of them she already knew, not by name though. Kobayashi stayed until late afternoon, when they cleaned the gym. She was about to go home, when Sugawara and Hinata stopped her.

''Do you want to go and grab a little bite at the store?'' Sugawara asked.

''We are getting buns!'', Hinata said.

''Oh well, I guess.'', Kobayashi said. She wondered what had happened to her usual neutral and antisocial self. On the other hand she always had a hard time saying no. A little group of volleyball members with Kobayashi went down to get buns. Sugawara went inside to buy, while the others waited outside.

''Excuse me, but I didn't catch your name..What was it?'', Yamaguchi asked.

''Kobayashi'', she said calmly and straightened her ponytail. She was still in her Judo gi.

''That Kobayashi? The girl who injured herself and three other players?'', Kageyama asked. She grinned her teeth together. The air was cold.

''Don't ever talk about the accident near me and don't ever say my first name. No one needs to know and I don't need to get remembered of it'', she said with and angered and bitter tone. Sugawara came out of the store and handed people their buns.

''Sure is chilly tonight'', he said and rubbed his arms. After people had finished their buns, they slowly walked home. One by one people went different directions until only Kobayashi and Hinata were left. Kobayashi waved goodbye and sat on her bike. Hinata followed her.

''hmm?'', Kobayashi said.

''Looks like we live close to each other'', Hinata said. ''Does your neighborhood have a little television shop?''.

''Yes, I live down that street!'', Kobayashi said.

''I live a couple of houses next to it!'' Hinata said. He smiled brightly and she returned the smile.

''Are you nervous about tomorrow?'', Kobayashi asked. She would always be nervous when she had to play. So nervous that she would freeze on the court for a couple of minutes.

''Yes! And excited!'', Hinata said. They drove past the television shop and Hinata stopped up.

''I live here!'', he said ''Goodbye, see you tomorrow!''

''See you!'', Kobayashi said. Would she even see him tomorrow? She didn't really know and drove home. When she layed in her bed, she thought of all the things she had done today. She became nervous about the volleyball team tomorrow. She wanted to come with them to Aoba Johsai, she wanted to cheer on them and see them play. She wanted to see the amazing quick between Kageyama and Hinata, which she came to admire. She wanted to wipe their tears if they lose and hug them when they win. But it would be weird for her suddenly to join them just because she helped them once during training. She rolled on her side. Would it be weird to just show up and ask to come with them? Could she even consider them as her friends? She sighted loudly. Somewhere in the back of her head and in the deepest corner of her soul, she wished that Hinata said ''See you tomorrow'' because he knows that she is going with them. She wished it so much that she would even ride on her bike to Aoba Johsai, just to see them play. She felt awkward, and happy. Happy to see people who enjoy her company and happy to feel this kind of happiness again. She won't play volleyball herself, but the boys made feel like she was a part of their team. But do they think the same?


End file.
